I scream, you scream. We all scream for Pouitne.

Poutine.
No, not the President of Russia. He's a Dick.

Poutine is a Canadian dish originating from Quebec, consisting of potato fries (that's chips to you and me), chicken gravy and cheese curds. Mmmmmmmmmmm.

Now I don't know how popular chips and gravy are in the rest of the UK, but in Glasgow it's the ultimate drunk food. Well, that and deep fried pizza. Oh yes you heard me right. 
Don't knock it till you've tried it pal!

Poutine is famous in Canada so it is and it's eventually sneaking it's wee cheesy, gravy head over this side of the pond. 

Hello Poutine. 


Now Who's your favorite Canadian Metal Band?

Rush? Nickleback???? ha ha, NO.

It's gotta be Strapping Young Lad hasn't it?
I want Devin Townsend to be my pal. 
He'd just make me laugh till my belly hurt. 

Here's a Strapping Young Lad video. Probably best not to watch this with a hangover. 
Not that I ever have hangovers being teetotal and all that. 

OOF! That was fun. 

As you know, I like to shake shit up a bit so i'll be changing the recipe a wee bit.
Instead of using normal chips I'm going to use sweet potatoes because I love them.
 And I'll be baking them in the oven instead of frying them to make the recipe slightly more healthy. 

Don't worry though folks..... APPETITE OF DESTRUCTION does not do diet food. It'll still be tastilicious (that's a word). 

I'm also using ready made chicken gravy as I plain just can't be arsed to make it myself today. 
If you are a purest feel free to make your own. 
I'll be having a beer while you do. Oh, no wait. A non alcoholic beer. Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.... aaaaaaaaah!

Well onwards and upwards. Here's the recipe.
If you eat it while drunk it tastes even better. Apparently. I wouldn't know!

Sweet Potato Poutine
serves 2

2 - 3 large sweet potatoes
200g of cheese curds (If you can't get cheese curds then just substitute it for
500g tub chilled chicken gravy
Olive oil
Quarter teaspoon cracked black pepper
One teaspoon smoked Cajun seasoning
Splash milk
Salt and pepper

Heat your oven to 220 degrees or equivalent.
Cut your sweet potatoes into thick chips. Leave the skin on, it makes them smokey and tasty.
Put into a big bowl and add the Cajun spice, a big pinch of salt and pepper and a big glug of olive oil and mix until all the sweet potato chips are coated.

Place into the oven and roast for about 25 to 30 minutes so that the potato is crispy and golden on the outside and soft on the inside. 

Armadillooooooooo!

Just before the potatoes are ready heat your gravy in a saucepan on medium heat until it is hot and bubbling lightly. 
Add the pepper and milk and give it a quick whisk. Take off the heat.

Place your sweet potato chips onto two plates then top with  the cheese curds and then pour over the gravy.

If you don't mumble "Oh dear God" when your mouth is full there's something wrong with you.

Enjoy.

Detox? Hey, come on!

From time to time we all overdo it a bit.

Beer, vodka, pork pies and late nights watching Dolph Lundgren films. Those are my vices.

 My kidneys ache, my liver has the cold sweats, my stomach wants to crawl out and slap me across the face.
My skin and hair....... Well, lucky me I'm blessed with a fine mane of hair like that of a Norse God (Thanks Mum and Dad).
It's OK, it balances out as I have the height of a 10 year old boy.

Now I don't condone any form of dieting. Bugger that.
If you want to loose weight change your lifestyle.

On the other hand I quite like my lifestyle but need a little break every now and then.

Some magic elixir that will do my insides good. Jagermeister? Ah ha ha. No!

I'm talking juice here people.
Detox juice. Lay off the booze for a few days and get some vitamins back into your system.

Here is a fitting video from Strapping Young Lad.
Don't watch it if you want to wind down.
THIS SHIT IS FULL THROTTLE!
I'm sitting with the laptop on my knees watching this and bashing my feet together franticly.

I

I actually went on a proper detox once.
 I lasted a week and a half,  had a complete mental breakdown and ran crying to KFC.
I will never eat brown rice again.

Apple, ginger, cucumber and spinach juice

2 apples (I like Granny Smith for the tartness) cored and cut into wedges
Quarter cucumber cut into chunks
Half teaspoon fresh minced ginger
Big hand full washed spinach

It's pretty simple really. If you have an electric juicer then just pop everything in and juice.
Otherwise, stick everything in a blender and  whizz until as smooth as possible. You can just drink it like this or pour it through a fine mesh sieve or muslin so you get rid of the bits.

You will feel better. Until your next beer.