When the Gumbo did my infatuation with Pepper Keenan start?

This recipe is in honour of my two favourite things.
Pepper Kennan. Front man and guitarist of Corrosion of Conformity and guitarist in Down, and good down home Southern Louisiana cooking.

(Other things of note which I love are Dolph Lundgren, Columbo, 80's action films, my Viking drinking horn, Mexican wrestling and pork pies. Oh, and vodka).

 To start the story.

I was a young girl, about the age of thirteen/ fourteen, in the bloom of my youth and just starting to get over my Eddie Vedder infatuation.
 I was watching the show Headbangers Ball on MTV which my Granny had kindly videotaped for me (yes, I said videotaped! it was the 90's).
My Gran was deemed posh on the scheme as she was one of the first to get cable.

So there I was watching the likes of Skintrade, Annihilator and Nuclear Assault when a video came on by a band called Corrosion of Conformity. Voting with a bullet to be precise.

There I saw a man.
Not your pretty boy Eddie Vedder type but a MAN!
A big hairy Metal Man by the name of Pepper Keenan.
That was it, my heart was his.




I’d imagine Pepper sitting on an old swing chair on a porch in our run down little shack, basking in the Louisiana sun.
Strumming a tune on his guitar, drinking a cold beer and eating some famous New Orleans (or N’awlins as the locals say) Gumbo that I had cooked for him.

After the gumbo was finished I'd bring him some freshly baked bread pudding which we would share from the same plate, feeding each other while laughing softly.

We’d sip some homemade lemonade laced with bourbon and kiss under the hot moonlit Louisiana sky.
Then he would take my hand and lead me to the bedroom where we would fall into a deep and comforting sleep in each others arms.

My sexual awakening hadn't happened yet. Clearly!

(For the record, I  completely made everything after the "voting with a bullet" video up. Hee hee. But I do write a damn good story don't I? )

You should check out my Mills and Boon tributes on "Jack n coke cupcakes"
http://appetiteofdestructionbook.blogspot.co.uk/2010/07/jack-n-coke-cupcakes.html
and "If Mills and Boon wrote recipe reviews".
http://appetiteofdestructionbook.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/if-mills-and-boon-wrote-recipe-reviews.html

I'm seriously considering a career as a Romantic novelist.


Here's something else for you to laugh at.
I call it:

An Ode to Good Ol’ Southern Cookin with Pepper

Oh dearest Pepper Keenan ,
You’re the size of a bear
With your big guitar riffs
And Man Metal hair

Your name goes with salt,
 Not sugar or spice
To share all my meals
With you would be nice

I’d make Turtle soup
And shit loads of crab
With Remoulade sauce
In which shrimps you could dab

I’d like to invite you
To eat Gumbo stew
With rice, shrimp and okra
Just me and you

I’ll fry up some Hush Puppies
To have on the side
And after some beers
We can have a good ride (On the St Charles Streetcar you filthy minded beggars)

I forgot about pudding
Now that wouldn’t do
I’ll make Bananas Foster
Just
Yes especially,
 just for you

As I would have said in the 90’s  “SCHWING"



Ok, Ok, here is the recipe then. I hope it is as authentic as it is in N’awlins.


N’awlins Gumbo

This makes a shit load of Gumbo. You canny make a small pot. It’s just not right. Invite people round, give it to your neighbours, the homeless, whomever and celebrate New Orleans style.

Ingredients:

note: This recipe calls for pepper. As in the spice. Please do not kidnap Pepper Keenan and try to cook him in a big pot of gumbo as this may lead to a spoiled stew and a lengthy prison sentance.

This is my Gumbo. Not a very good photo but damn it was tasty.

This is andouille Gumbo from the Gumbo Shop in New Orleans. This is the colour your Gumbo should be,

Andouille sausage (If you can’t get Andouille then you can use chorizo or merguez ) cut into chunky rings about 2cm thick
500g okra washed and stalks cut off
10 Big fat raw tiger prawns de shelled and de veined. (Oh fuck this. It’s NOT a vain. It’s the prawn’s shite pipe. I have no need of being polite, so de shite pipe the prawns).
150g butter
100g flour
2 Green bell peppers diced
6 stalks Celery diced
2 large onions diced
3 bay leaves
1 teaspoon tomato purée
Teaspoon fresh thyme
1 teaspoon smoked paprika
2litres Chicken stock or one chicken stock cube dissolved in 2 litres of boiling water
Couple splashes hot sauce
Big handful chopped fresh parsley
Salt and pepper

First thing you need is a BIG heavy bottomed pot.
Next you need to make your roux.
Put your pot onto a medium heat and plop in the butter. Once melted and starting to bubble slightly add the flour and stir.
Turn heat down to low and cook the roux, stirring every now and then until it is the colour of peanut butter, This will take about 10 to 15 minutes but be patient. It's worth it. Just keep an eye on it and make sure it doesn't burn.
When your roux is ready add the smoked paprika, onion, celery and green peppers.
Cook for about 5 minutes stirring every now and then until softened.
Add the sausage and cook for 5 minutes.
Add the okra and cook for a few minutes.
Add the chicken stock, thyme, bay leaves, hot sauce, tomato purée, salt and pepper.
Stir and bring to a simmer.
Cook slowly for about 40 minutes or until the okra is tender.
Plop in the prawns and cook for about 3 minutes. You don't want the prawns to go like rubber.
Take off the heat and add the chopped parsley.
Serve with boiled rice and nice crusty bread.

No, no. It's OK. You don't have to thank me.

Ich liebe Currywurst.

Du, Du hast, Du hast Currywurst?
I don't. I frikin love, love, love currywurst.
I love it soo much that I am the proud owner of a ceramic Currywurst dish.

Oh yes, this plate is specificaly designed for Currywurst. That's dedication.

So, what is Currywurst then?
Well, it's juicy Bratwurst or Knockwurst sausages grilled to crispy perfection then smothered in a sweet, spicy curry flavoured ketchup.
Usually served with pommes frites and a wee dollop of mayonaise.

I'm sure the big strapping lads in Rammstein have had their fair share of this dish.
I tried to eat my Currywurst while listeneing to this song but I was rocking out so much I got sauce all over my face.
Not a good look.



I've used a really quick and simple recipe for the Currywurst sauce so you can make this dish in about half an hour.

Currywurst mit Pommes Frites

serves 2

Ingredients

5 bratwurst or knockwurst sausages. You can also use vegetarian hot dogs for this recipe too.

For the sauce
200ml water
1 mild Spanish onion, chopped very fine
1 tablespoon sweet paprika
3 tablespoons curry powder
500ml tomato ketchup
Small glug sunflower oil

French fries
Mayonnaise

I cook my sausages in the oven so they are extra crispy on the outside so preheat your oven to 200 degrees or equivalent.

Lightly grease an oven tray and pop your sausages on and place in the oven and cook for about 20 to 25 minutes turning every now and then to brown and crispify all over.

While the sausages are cooking make the sauce and cook your french fries.
To make the sauce put a small glug of olive oil into a pan and heat on medium.

Add half of the chopped onion and cook for about 5 to 8 minutes stirring every now and then till softened and translucent.

Add the curry powder and paprika and cook for about one minute till fragrant.

Add the ketchup and water, stir well then simmer for about 10 to 15 minutes until thick.

When sausages are ready, chop into pieces and put into the sauce. Stir and cook for a few minutes till sauce takes the flavour of the sausages.

To serve put your sausages on a plate (or specially designed Currywurst plate) and sprinkle with the rest of the raw chopped onion and extra curry powder.

Serve with your fries and a dollop of mayonnaise.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Snawbaws! That's Glaswegian for "snowballs" by the way

Oozy Snawbaws, You know you wanna lick the ooze. Do it. I won't tell.

Hello one and all.
This here recipe is inspired by the frosty Kingdom of the North.
Yeah, that's right.! GLASGOW.

Be that as it may, it's actually really sunny right now. GASP!
I may get my yearly recommended dose of Vitamin D yet.

The little oozy balls (or baws as we say) above are made of chocolate cake covered in coconut with raspberry marshmallow filling.
Dang they were tasty.

Here's a fitting frosty video by Immortal to get you in the mood.
I  did not wear corpse paint while making the baws.
In hindsight, I wish I had.

Just for the record, when I first read the title for the video I thought it said "Grim and Frostbitten Kittens".
Now that would make a good video.





Snawbaws

Makes 12

Ingredients

1 jar raspberry marshmallow fluff
300g chocolate cake. You can make your own or buy it in if you can't be bothered.
250g buttercream. Again, you can make this yourself or buy it in.
200g desecrated (har har, I feel I have made this joke before?) coconut

First you want to put your marshmallow fluff in the freezer. Preferably overnight but a couple of hours will suffice.

Next, get your choc cake and break it up into a bowl and crumble with your fingers till you get fine crumbs.

Mix the buttercream with the chocolate crumbs till combined and mouldable. You can make rude shapes with it as this point for fun if you feel the need. Then divide into 12 equal balls.

Put your coconut onto a flat plate.

Get your marshmallow fluff out the freezer and using a teaspoon get 12 blobs. Roll the blobs in your hands till you get something resembling a ball. You can dust your hands with icing sugar to stop it from sticking to your hands.

Grab a ball of choc cake mix and flatten it in your hand. Place the marshmallow fluff ball in the middle and press the chocolate cake mix around it. If you don't cover it all they will get a bit oozy like the ones I made but they still taste great.

When covered, roll the balls in the coconut, place onto a plate or tray. When all the balls are made cover with cling film and put into the fridge for about an hour.

They are great with coffee. Even better with Long Island Ice Tea. Hee hee.

Apologies for the poor quality photo. I'd had a lot of Long island Iced Tea.

The Spaghetti Incident

Hallo there friends.
I came home from work yesterday wanting something "nice and tasty" for my dinner.
I eat "the bad things" too much so decided to make something semi healthy. Ha ha......
Hey, It's not my fault my favourite things are beer and pork pies. OK, it is my fault.
Regardless, I decided to make a quick healthy...ish pasta dish.

Spaghetti with shallots, cherry tomatoes, garlic, chilli and herbs

It was very tasty. So tasty in fact that when I had finished eating it I was filled with a sense of harmonious joy.
True. I love it when you eat something that's so satisfying it just makes you happy.
My belly thanked me.
We have a very close relationship, my belly and I. I give it everything it wants and then at night I fall asleep while hugging it. That's love.

So the dish is named after the Guns n Roses album "The Spaghetti Incident".
I have to be truthful, I don't really like the album so I put up the video for " Sweet Child O' Mine" instead.
It's a classic. One of my favourite intros of all time.
In fact the other night me and Lesley went out and we had a conversation abot this.
Here are some of our other favourite intros

Pantera - Walk  http://youtu.be/AkFqg5wAuFk Simple but brutal.

Jimi Hendrix - Voodoo Child  http://youtu.be/wMEeJVBhAnQ Sexy intro, makes me wanna girate my hips.

Free - all right Now http://youtu.be/ydItRbb0b1E My dad looks like Paul Rogers. Really!

Sepultura - Chaos AD http://youtu.be/6ODNxy3YOPU I still want hair like Andreas Kisser. Soft. So soft.

Metallica - Ride the lightning http://youtu.be/xRn2VY7qs5w Nee nee, Nee nee, Nee nee, Nee nee.

Corrosion of Conformity - Clean my wounds http://youtu.be/yvsQsao1F88 Clearly I'm biased with this one. Anything with Pepper Keenen I like.

Fear Factory - Resurrection http://youtu.be/v_OHJxN9C1Y Makes me want to cry.




To the recipe Batman...................

Spaghetti with cherry tomatoes, garlic, chilli and herbs

Serves 2

Ingredients

200g spaghetti
200g ripe cherry tomatoes halved
4 shallots peeled, halved and sliced finely
50ml good quality olive oil
Splash avocado oil
2 teaspoons minced garlic don't kiss anyone after this
Half teaspoon minced red chilli
BIG hand full flat leaf parsley chopped roughly
BIG hand full basil torn roughly
Salt and pepper

Put a big pan of salted water on to boil.
Add your spaghetti and cook for about 10 minutes stirring occasionally until al dente.
While the pasta is cooking put the olive oil and avocado oil into a pan and heat on medium.
Add the shallots, garlic and chilli and cook for about 5 minutes until shallots are soft and fragrant.
Add the cherry tomatoes and cook for about another 5 minutes until soft .
Drain your cooked pasta and add to the pan.
Take off the heat and add your herbs, salt and pepper. Mix well and eat right away.
So satisfying. You don't need bread or salad with this as it's great on its own.

Wok......... You talkin to me? You talkin to me?

I would like to dedicate this recipe to my friend Sharon.

Hello Sharon

Sharon is a vegetarian.

Yes, I know. She doesn't eat pork! Sheesh.

Anyway.

If you are a fellow vegetarian then you will understand Sharon's frustration .
She goes out for a nice meal at a restaurant and looks at the menu.
Here's what she sees in the "vegetarian" option.

Mushroom risotto

Red onion/ vegetable goat's cheese puff pastry tart served with side salad.

Come on chefs. Show a little bit of imagination.

And just for the record.

YOU CAN SERVE VEGETABLE SIDE DISHES WITH VEGETARIAN MAINS.

Enough with the paltry "served with salad".

WHOOP DE DOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GIVE ME MORE VEGETABLES, DAMN IT!

I want veg with my veg. I want mountains of veg, I want a cornucopia of veg, a veritable feast of veg.

VEG, VEG, VEG.

I imagine that's what Sharon would say?

Is that what you would say Sharon?

One of the exceptions though is Chop Chop in Edinburgh where Sharon took us to gorge ourselves .
They have a great selection of veggie food. Especially the noodles with mustard and peanut sauce. Yum. Check out the menu online at
http://www.chop-chop.co.uk/

I have concocted this little veggie main dish for you Sharon. It takes very little time to make.

So next time you go to a Restaurant and they try to pap you off with mushroom risotto,
throw the menu at them, give them the finger and go home and make yourself this instead.

Crispy fried tofu and aubergine in a spicy Chinese sauce

Here is Sharon's Metal song of choice for today's blog.

Wok on home boy.........................

Ingredients
Serves 4

2 aubergines
2 packs smoked tofu cut into large cubes
6 shallots peeled, halved and sliced
1 teaspoon minced garlic
1 teaspoon minced ginger
2 teaspoons minced red chilli
100g yellow bean sauce
2 tablespoons light soy sauce
1 tablespoon thick dark soy sauce
1 teaspoon sugar
1 tablespoon white rice vinegar
1 teaspoon mirin (Japanese seasoning)
1 teaspoon cornflour
100ml water
Sunflower oil for frying

Put your Wok onto a high heat and add a big splash of sunflower oil.
When hot add your aubergine, you'll probably need to do this in a few batches. Fry, turning occasionally until browned on all sides. Drain onto kitchen paper.

Repeat this step with the tofu and drain that on kitchen paper too.

Next, fry your shallots, ginger, chilli and garlic in a little hot oil for a few minutes until shallots are softened.

Add the soy sauces, yellow bean sauce, sugar, vinegar, mirin and water. Give it a good mix then add your aubergine and tofu.

Stir and bring simmer on low for about 10 minutes until aubergine and tofu have taken on the flavour of the sauce.

Next mix the corn flour with a little water to  and add to your wok. Stir and cook for one minute until sauce has thickened.

Serve with a bowl of steamed sticky or jasmine rice.

Mmmmmmmm. Meaty without the meat.

If Mills and Boon wrote recipe reviews.

I call this story " I Dream in Chocolate".

I walked into the room. The air was hot and filled with a sweet musk. 
There, lying on the counter......  The sight I held before me made my knees weaken.
I saw in an instant what I had been longing for. What my body needed.
My passions igniting. Anticipation sending shocks of electricity shooting through my whole body.
Unconsciously I moved forward. My hand reaching out to touch the soft, supple, glistening moistness.
Calling to me, beckoning me.
I let my fingers caress the surface. I slid my hand in between its moistness and a cold shock surged through me.
My heart started to race.
Before I knew it I was on my knees devouring it whole.
Oh, the exquisite ecstasy.
My body shook.
I gasped, flush with gorging.

Damn that was a good mint, choc, chip, chocolate sponge, ice cream sandwich.
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Here's a little song to get you in the loving mood and make you come over all a quiver.

A Very English Treat.

A very English treat for a very English Metal band.
Iron Maiden. One of the Pioneers of the New Wave of British Heavy Metal.

Now what dare you say, might a quaint English Heavy Metal fan have as a little treat in between sipping tea and headbanging?

Tiffin.

It sounds kinda naughty doesn't it?
Well it is!
Gooey, crunchy and sweet all at the same time.

Tiffin is what Americans would call " chocolate refrigerator cake".
There's lots of versions but typically it has chocolate, digestive biscuits, Golden syrup, butter and dried fruit.

I threw a whole loada other crap in it too. but hey, that's just me.

You probably expected me to put up one of the classic videos. Fear of the Dark maybe? Number of The Beast etc.
But no. I like The Wicker Man. It makes me wanna punch the air and rejoice in the fact that no matter how time passes, Iron maiden are still the dogs bollocks,
Maiden, Maiden, Maiden, Maiden....................





Tiffin

Makes 16 squares

Ingredients:

500g milk chocolate
200g digestive biscuits
150g glace cherries
100g unsalted butter
4 tablespoons golden syrup
100g mini marshmallows (optional)
50g dessicated coconut (optional)


Grease a shallow square tin about 8" x 8".

Put your digestives into a big bowl and bash them up a little with a rolling pin. You want the pieces to be quite chunky.
Add the glace cherries, marshmallows and coconut and mix together.

Break up 250g of the milk chocolate and place into a heat proof bowl. Add the butter and golden syrup.

Microwave on medium for about 3 to 4 minutes, stirring and checking regularly until melted.

Mix till smooth then pour over the rest of the ingredients. Mix thoroughly and put into your square tin and level out.

Melt the remainder of the chocolate in a heatproof bowl as above for a few minutes and then pour over the tiffin. Spread out then place tiffin in fridge for a few hours to set.

Cut into 16 squares and serve. Goes nice with a good cuppa.

Quite!