Feed My Frankenstein

God I freakin love this song. God I freakin love Waynes World.
I wish I was 23 and living back in the early 90's. That would be awesome.
I'd go to Seattle and hang out with Pearl Jam and Soundgarden and Alice in Chains and tell them all to lay off the freakin Heroin. It's bad for you by the way!

In honour of this song here is my Frankenstein inspired recipe for cupcakes.




Frankenstein cuppity cakes or green velvet and white chocolate

Makes 12
Ingredients

For the cake
30ml green food colouring
Half teaspoon vanilla
30g white cocoa powder (if you can't find white cocoa powder then you can use white drinking chocolate but you will need about 100g of this)
1 egg beaten
60g soft unsalted butter
150g caster sugar
150g plain flour
Half tsp bicarbonate of soda
Half tsp salt
120ml natural yoghurt
1 and half tsp white wine vinegar

Butter icing

125g soft unsalted butter
250g icing sugar
Half tsp vanilla
15ml green food colour

Preheat your oven to 180 degrees or equivalent (160 for fan oven)
Line your muffin tin with paper cases.
In a small bowl whisk together the white chocolate powder, vanilla and green food colour.
In a bowl sieve together the flour, bicarb of soda and salt.
Next using an electric mixer whisk the sugar and butter on high till it becomes white and creamy looking.
Once the butter and sugar is ready while still mixing on high add about a third of the beaten egg and whisk for one minute repeat with the other two thirds of the beaten egg.
Add the green cocoa mix and mix on low till just incorporated.
Sieve in half the flour mix and mix on low till just incorporated.
Add the yoghurt and mix on low till just incorporated then sieve in the rest of the flour mix and mix on low till just incorporated.
Add the vinegar and mix on high for 1 minute.
Separate the mix between the 12 cases then bake in the oven for 30 min or until a tooth pick inserted comes out clean. (I've made this recipe tons of times and it never needs more than 30 min).
Take cakes out of oven and put on a wire rack to cool.

Once cakes are cool you can make the icing.
Whack all the ingredients into a big bowl and start mixing on low till incorporated. Otherwise you'll get icing sugar everywhere. Put the speed up to high and mix for a few minutes until soft and fluffy.

Pipe or spread over the cupcakes.

You can decorate with choc sprinkles or black jelly sweets or whatever you can find that looks minging.

Was it wrong to laugh?

Yello everyone.
How are you all today? Good I trust.
I'm having a few wee problems with my camera again so that's why I aint been blogging for a few weeks. Well that and the fact that It was me and my twinny Arlene's Birthday, Claire's Birthday, My wee Grannie's Birthday my Dad's Birthday, my friend Kath is over from New Zealand and whaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Celebrations have been going on  for a whole month now don'tcha know.
Anyhoos, I think I'm all partied out and getting back into my normal routine of making nice food and force feeding it to Pauline. She loves it.
Tonight I'm making porky schnitzel. Yum.
Due to my cameralessness I'm sticking up a few wee recipes that I have back logged. Don't like putting up recipes without being able to prove I made them. I am no fraud.

So on one of my days off I stuck my head into the cupboard to see what I could make. Ready steady cook stylee again. I checked the back of the cupboard but unfortunately our new flat does not come with a Narnia out the back. Gutted. Yeah newbies. This is a throw back to an old blog.

I had bought a Cumberland sausage ring from Westmoorland farm shop on the way back from Hammerfest. Yes, yes. The blog for that is still in construction. It's a trilogy though and it takes some people a whole life time to write them????

Aye, so Cumberland sausage. I had a pack of cooked black lentils too, so decided to make sausages with lentils in tomato sauce. Mmmmmmmmmm.



I was too hungry to wait till after the photo to start eating it.

While I was making said dish I had Scuzz on the TV in the background. I heard a guitar riff that drew me like the rats to the pied piper into the living room. I sat on the arm of the couch, covered in tomato sauce splashes and watched the video. It was from a band called Revoker and the song was called Stay Down.
S

I couldn't make my mind up about what was going on in this song. It was like early 90's Grungyness smashing into the naughties hardcore movement. The hardcore guitars riffage and growly, shouty chorus and then the flamboyant, slightly overacted campness of the main singer. I dunno. I sat there laughing. But you know what? I bloody well like it. So there.

Here's my recipe for sausages and lentils. Enjoy.

Lentils in a tray

Add a sausage

Et Voilà

Sausage and lentils for two

Ingredients

200g Cumberland sausage ring
250g pack ready to eat black or puy lentils (I got mine from Merchant Gourmet)
1 red onion diced fine
3 cloves garlic minced
1 stick celery diced fine
1 400g tin chopped tomatoes
1 bouquet garni
Hand full sun blush tomatoes
Half teaspoon paprika
Half teaspoon dried oregano
Half teaspoon dried basil
Glug olive oil
Glug red wine
1 chicken jelly stock cube
1 tablespoon maple syrup
200ml water
Salt and pepper

First you want to make your tomato sauce.
Put a glug of olive oil into a saucepan and put onto a medium heat.
Add the onion, celery, garlic and paprika and cook for a few minutes until vegetables are softened and garlic is smelling lovely and fragrant.
Add the chopped tomatoes, bouquet garni, basil, oregano, red wine, jelly stock cube, water and a pinch of salt and pepper. Stir then bring to the boil. Once it has started to boil turn it down to a low simmer and cook for 30 minutes stirring every now and then to make sure the sauce does not stick to the pan.
Pre heat your oven to 190 or equivalent.
When sauce is ready, take out the bouquet garni and stir in the lentils. Put into an oven proof dish.
Pop the sausage on top of the lentils and cook in the oven for 35 to 40 minutes until sausage is cooked through. The juice and fat from the sausage will drip into the lentils and make them super nice.
Check the seasoning and serve. I made some soft polenta to go with mine but you could serve it with a nice green salad or a big chunk of bread to mop up the juices.

Stay down, on the ground.

Breakfast Burrito as big as your Heid.

Halloooooo Y'all,
Do ya feel like a breakfast fit for a Luchador?
I know I do.



This was after half the contents of the burrito fell on my shoes

My friend Lynne (of Panteratone pudding fame) asked me if I had a good recipe for a breakfast burrito.
She had tried them in the US of A and when she made them at home she couldn't get them quite right.
Never having eaten  a breakfast burrito before I took to the challenge with all the ferocity of a sweaty, pumped up, tiny panted Luchador about to fight his biggest, baddest rival and tear the mask from his salt sweat, blood dripping face. Ahem.
So I looked on Google. Yes, we chefs do that too.
I scoured loads of recipes and well, to be sure I ate far too many burritos than any person could. But I think I've got something pretty close.
Let me know what you think Lynne. If it's not up to scratch then I will retire back to the kitchen like a mad scientist and work on my experiment till it LIIIIIIIIIIVES!












Breakfast Burrito as big as yer Heid

Serves 2 but damn they are big

Ingredients

2 large flour tortillas
4 eggs
Splash milk
1 red pepper seeded and diced
4 hot peppadew peppers ( or chilli peppers in vinegardiced finely
1 red onion sliced finely
2 cloves garlic minced
Half teaspoon smoked paprika
pinch dried oregano
2 big hand fulls shredded iceberg
1 avocado chopped roughly and mixed with the juice of half a lime
I tomato deseeded and roughly chopped
2 big hand fulls strong cheddar cheese grated
2 tablespoons salsa shop bought or fresh
Salt and peeper
Splash hot sauce
Glug vegetable oil

Whisk your eggs in a bowl with the splash of milk and a pinch of salt and pepper. Set to the side.
Next heat a glug of vegetable oil on a medium high heat. Add the onions and garlic and fry for a few minutes until softened.
Add the smoked paprika and oregano and fry for another minute.
Add the diced red pepper and cook for a minute or two until just softened. You still want the peppers to have a bit of bite.
Add the peppadews and then pour in the eggy mixture. Stir continuously until the eggs are scrambled to how you like them. I like my scrambled eggs firm so I cooked it for about 5 minutes. No runny eggs for this girl.
Take eggy mix off the heat.
Next heat your flour tortillas for a minute in the microwave.
Spread over the salsa, top with the iceberg, avocado and chopped tomato. Sprinkle over a little salt and pepper. Sprinkle over the cheese then top with the eggy mixture and add a few splashes of hot sauce.
Roll up and serve. This is messy so don't wear your Sunday best.

Toodles. X